Trial And Error

GoodBadGood

Well, I loaded the film correctly. That was good.
Our instructor couldn't get the Polaroid back that we use to check lighting and exposure to work. That was bad.
I shot without the polaroid and it came out just as I had intended. That was good.

I processed the sheet film last night and ran a couple of test prints. I now really wish I hadn't listened to the instructor when she said to crop tighter in the camera. I knew I needed more space than what she was suggesting to end up with the crop that was in my head. Someday I will learn to trust myself. Someday soon, if crap like this keeps happening.

4x5

It's been a while since I loaded 4x5 film. I did it at home in the closet last night because we have our first large format assignment of the semester to shoot tonight.

And really. Would you want to end up in a little room with some fumbling, smelly idiot who can't load their film? And you stand there for 30 minutes of your precious shooting time waiting for them to finally give up or ask you to do it.

This is why I waited until dark and shoved a towel against the closet door and risked getting cat hair all over my film by loading it near the clothing that Starling likes to burrow in while I'm getting ready in the morning.

I desperately want to avoid a situation I've been trapped in MORE THAN ONCE.

And they're off!

Before:

During:

And after!

I'm going to gain weight just because eating is so much easier. The first thing I had? A nice, medium-rare steak that didn't once get caught on anything. Ahhhh.
People who notice things will see that my mole is on a different side. I took the first one in a mirror.

RX8 Remix

I hope this looks good on the peecee, too.

First day of classes today! Hopefully, I won't be there until the scheduled 9:50pm. I mean, what am I going to do in darkroom when I haven't shot anything yet?

And the braces come off Wednesday! Woot!

WTF?

To the person who hit the dog in front of my house last night:

He's okay, asshole. Not that you stopped to check.
And no, it wasn't my dog. I don't have a dog.

But that didn't stop me from leaping out of bed and frantically throwing on shorts and a shirt to fly down the stairs and out the front door saying "ohgodohgodohgod" about 100 times in the 60 seconds it took me to get outside. It didn't matter that I didn't know who's dog it was that was yelping and screaming the entire time I was struggling to move FASTER so that I could help if need be. I only needed to hear the sickening thump of a car hitting something that wasn't metal to be concerned. There was no sound of squealing brakes, either.

After all of that, the dog comes listing towards me. You could tell he was in a little pain, like he had a cramp in his side. No broken bones, no blood. Then he just trotted right on by. If I were him, I wouldn't have come to a human after that either.

Soon

So many things will be happening soon. Classes start next week. I get these braces off next week. You know, being in college and having braces at 29 makes you feel, well, a lot less than 29.

Soon, I will start working out again.

Soon, I will look for a job that doesn't make me feel like killing some one.

Soon, I will focus on my photography. (No pun intended.)

Soon, I will use the "Learn to Draw" books and pencils and drawing paper sitting on the coffee table.

Soon, I will get throught the Final Cut Express book so that I may start my own projects.

Soon, I will scan the rest of the Colorado slide film.

Soon, I will stop typing lists and just do things.

Soon.

See?

I'm scanning!

Queer Issues

So, the problem with my idea that I stole from Carson is that I'll need a full-length mirror. I wonder if I can get the hubby to go shopping today.

In other news, I finally finished the sites I was working on and can scan this weekend. Yeah. Scanning is a little boring. I'll read my Final Cut Express book in the mean time.

What? You didn't think a photographer could resist moving pictures, did you? Silly!

Met a New Friend

So, my friend Julie introduced me to one of her friends. (Look, a real-life Friendster event.) She was adopted and recently went looking for her birth mother. Her story was especially touching to me because she found out that her mother is Bi-polar. (Manic/Depressive, whatever they're calling it nowadays.)

My brother was diagnosed as Bi-polar quite some time ago and when this woman started detailing her mother's behavior, I was struck yet again by the similarities. I've met other people who have Bi-polar family members and the stories are always the same. I realize this is the way a diagnosed problem usually occurs, but sometimes I think we don't want to believe it. We don't want to think that this is not a choice. Some recess of our minds keeps saying, "They could be normal if they tried." It's just not true. Part of the problem also lays in the unusual mind set of the Bi-polar personality. They don't want to take their medication. (I've only met one who consistently took their medication. Great person!) They want to be "normal". Just try convincing them that they are normal under medication. Uh uh. Nope. Doesn't work.

At any rate, you occassionaly run into some one who makes you realize that you've been whining about trivial crap for most of your life. There's always some one who has it tougher.

Queer Eye Idea

So I got a really good tip from "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" last night. Carson, the witty, sarcastic blonde, said that he lays out his clothing each day and snaps a polaroid so that he doesn't repeat a look within a 30 day period.

My version? To snap a pic of myself in a mirror with the camera phone and blog it to an album. Not to avoid repetition so much as a way to motivate myself to actually do something with my hair and clothing in the morning. When you work in a position where you don't see the public and they let you wear jeans and t-shirts, well, you wear jeans and t-shirts. Basically, I look like crap everyday. I don't care what others think of that, but when you think you look bad, it's time to do something!